Weredog Tart (11)

   
   "Weredog Tart (11)"
   
   To the Colonial Americans, it was dubbed the Full Summer Moon, so full and with effulgent brilliance, lighting up the night sky along with the stars above glittering, offering further nighttime illumination; anyway, Siria intrinsically knew what was going to happen--could feel it in her bones; thus, dashed past Dad sleeping on the couch, making sure to take the Iron City beer out of his sleeping hand and set it on the local rag next to him.
   Next, she stripped down to her nakedness, went out into the backyard, and as Luna burst completely full--she was ignited into a hairy, golden-hued weredog, tail aimed high and happy, her further full of glee, smelling everything around, and while wanting to squat and piss on a great number of things, she remained cognizant in a human sense, and thought:  LANCE McGEE!
   She knew he lived about 10 miles from her central Pittsburgh location, in the low populated borough of Wilmerding, southeast of her exact location, but she was up for a long sprint.
   As if running with unearthly power, Siria, tongue hanging out like the great Michael Jordan, sniffed out Lance's little house, and paced out front, her sensitive ears picking up the verbal action inside.  A fatherly voice scolding his son, yelling:  "You dumb shit!  Summer school!  And your skinny ass is only playing second string, actually third, cause you're too stupid to remember the playbook.  Why can't you be a bad ass like the Pirates' Gerrit Cole!?!"
   Lance voiced:  "That's baseball Dad."
   His Dad commanded:  "You're still a dumb ass.  Do you want to end up a coal truck-driver like me?"
   Lance said:  "I was thinking about becoming a welder."
   His Dad laughed:  "Like the movie Flashdance.  You're such a pussy son."
   Siria couldn't help but growl, loudly.  Next, she dropped her canine head and humbly went back home, knowing it sucked to be truly human and without the gifts of charity and love from supposed family.  Tough love works not on the mentally challenged, unless you want to drive them to suicide.