Werefox Vaquero--yonder yokel

     
   "Werefox Vaquero--yonder yokel"

   
   Jeremy wasn't a half-bad yokel; moreover, he wasn't a good man; however, he was a decent guy--a totally decent guy.  Sure, he had his flaws, like a protruding belly that did hang over his britches, and not in a Valley Girl bodacious fashion.  Never forget the Valley Girl.  California was totally awesome in the 1980's.  Johnny Carson--ya know.  I think the greatest talk show host always drove a Corvette, mostly.
   So, Jeremy ain't no cowboy.  Prefers a rice-burning Suzuki, merely armed with 250cc's, rather than a thundering horse gelled with a dangerous stampede of hoofs and iron.
   For protection, out in the Free West, Jeremy carried a tire iron--went old school.  Didn't even have a cowboy hat or shirt with a collar.  Didn't even like the Dallas Cowboys; indeed, he was moved by the Pittsburgh Steelers, remembering the blue-collar man forged in steel during the Jack Lambert days.
   Jeremy was an old timer as well.  Little did the pudgy paragon of bachelor butt-kicking know--he was about to get wrangled up in some live-action, playing the part of sidekick to the portion of Ela and Max.  And even though he didn't know--heck, he was ready.  Like SpongeBob, in a non-aquatic way.