American Bad Asses

   
   "American Bad Asses"
   
   I'm coyoting a portion of this; nonetheless, works for me.  Here's 3 American Bad Asses.
   
1.)  Harry S. Truman--no college, good for him, never getting Kool-Aid poured down his throat, and baby:  The Buck Stops Here.  He said, more or less:  "You can accomplish anything--if you don't care who gets the credit."
  
2.)  Hunter S. Thompson--this bad ass never met a narcotic he didn't like, and I say, good for him, you bunch of liberty haters.  Hung out with the Hell's Angels.  Drank the shit out of it; plus, liked to blow up gas propane tanks in his backyard with a shotgun.

3.)  G. Gordon Liddy--when God was passing out bad asses, no man got a better one.  Mr. Liddy transcends muscle, the little killer, being pure gristle.  His bad ass was locked up in the Federal Penitentiary for near 6 years, and all he did was kick ass.  They sent some Black Panthers after him to rattle his cage, and Mr. Liddy went into them with pure spirit.  He always said:  "If you're in an alley at night and 3 guys try to mug you; next, pick the biggest and ugliest; then, go into him with everything you've got.  Too, I have the largest genitalia in America."  Guy's practically a Saint--in my book.  He can get a woman pregnant by simply sitting next to her.  It doesn't get any more bad ass than this guy.  

STAR WARS Episode II Anakin and his mother

Saint John the Eagle; plus, Dogs

   
   "Saint John the Eagle; plus, Dogs"
   
   I can't remember, even though my mind is photographic, the number of people who have tried to kill me, persecute me with brainwashing, lock me up in 3 States, and in a psychiatric facility.  Go screw yourselves, or my Mother will do it for you.  YUP, AND I BOLDLY SAY TO YOU BASTARDS THAT DOUBT FATIMA:  The Virgin Mary has legs.  The best.  She shows her legs to me.  They're ivory.  As white as snow.  And She has ice water in her veins.  I'm frigid myself; thus, I honor my Mother, without Freud's demon.  I don't even blink.  She is my Mother, you pornographic sleazeballs.  If you think you have your Salvation Protestants, think again.  You take Christ off the Cross, and deny His death.  You have no crucifix.  You kill the Virgin, because Martin Luther had an Oedipus Complex, the bastard--the fucking German schmuck.  Nietzsche even abandoned his German heritage, because Martin Luther wanted to screw Jesus' Mother.  Get over it!
   You steal the Holy Family.  You steal Mary, the Angels, Saints, Prophets, and Kings.  You put Jesus in your pocket, as if He doesn't have a Mother.  If you can't stand in the Virgin's presence; next, you can't stand in the presence of Christ, for He resides with His Mother--She is the Gate of Heaven; moreover, She has great legs, all angels do, and I'm pleased with Her perfect beauty, for beauty has Her way.  Are you mad at God because you are ugly?  You fools.  The Virgin is the ultimate super-model, and I'm freaking ugly, and I accept it, honoring Her, and not complaining about my portion.
   You hate beauty, because you do not possess it.  You have envy.  You sea hags that destroy true love.  Your daughter was meant for me, and I was meant for her.  Recall Easter Sunday, when you bitched out my Rh negative empathy, saying that I was not good enough for your daughter.  Too young; too stupid.  Who is the exposed and unmasked sea hag now?  I came not to bring peace, Christ mentioned, but put daughter against mother.  Your children do not belong to you, but God Himself.  Remember how Tobias did love-make.  All for the glory of God.  And he had an angel dog, that you spit on.  Learn how to sell ice cream, as you've crushed true love.  But you know what hag, she still loves me, and I know it.  Your husband wants to see her smile, and he is obedient and faithful, ever patient, like Saint Joseph himself, and you make him your prize and your property, when he only belongs to God.
   Am I crazy?  Am I homosexual?  Indeed, how bad do you want to know!?!    

Guns N' Roses-One In A Million w/Lyrics

The Rods of Aaron and Moses

   
   "The Rods of Aaron and Moses"
   
   Aaron--Moses' big brother, and he gets no credit in Hollywood.  The Golden Triangle:  Academia, Media, Celebrity, or something like that, all lies, mostly.
   They put their Rods in the Ark, and they morphed into almonds.  Eat a few almonds everyday; next, you cut your risk of cancer in half, so some say.  
   Moses was shy.  Send my brother Aaron to speak for me.  Aaron did.  He loved his little brother.
   I always wanted to be pals with my big brother, but he would have none of it.  I looked up to him, especially his greatest possession--a fire-red 1969 Mustang with a small block; specifically, a 302, factory hood induction, and dual exhaust--it would hit sixty in a flat six.  Pretty good.  But the private college goons called him a redneck, and he sold it.  He should've owned it.  It eats Jaguars for breakfast.  Nothing could take it out of the hole--we're talking some serious torque.
   He sold his soul.  Wanted to be a historian, but got talked into other things.  Still, he loves the Razorbacks, God Bless him.  His daughter could've won the Bram Stoker Award, living in his apartment over the garage with 27 cats and having no friends.  She's a genius, linguistically.  But drank the Kool-Aid and got all pseudo-medical.  His middle child is gifted.  I can tell.  Has great empathy, beyond even me.  I hope he remembers that he is a King, not a Brown.  He was built for mercy.  
   But hell, I'm a schlemiel when it comes to socializing; moreover, a schlimazel when it comes to the ladies.  Thank God the Lord gave me a cabbage and not a brain.  I would've been dangerous if I had a brain; however, the sublime thing about being a cabbage--people underestimate you.  So, I'm not a total schmuck after all, as I Confessed, face to face, with my Priest on Saturday, as if the Virgin Herself was calling me a Schmuck.  I can do more for my mother.  You can always give more.  But money makes us anxious and greedy.  Fuck it.  Give, and ye shall receive.  

My Step-Brother: The Best of Men

   
   "My Step-Brother:  The Best of Men"
   
   G. Gordon Liddy said, as did L7:  "What's up with what's going down."  Indeed, that bad Mofo flipped it all around.  He took his labelled shame, and put it on you bastards.  Mr. Liddy will and does will, if only to kick ass and take no prisoners.
   My step-brother survived more than anyone I know.  He's a survivor.  His brother and nephews wouldn't last two seconds; moreover, he's a Christian, and a better soldier than any of you.  Too, he's a historian when it comes to the Civil War, and I've walked many a battlefield with him.  A damn Yankee and a Rebel, just a walk in the park.  Also, he gets no credit, nor does his wife.  I love them, because everybody spits on them.  My Pap loved my step-brother too, and prayed for him, always; specifically, my Serbian Pap said:  "That kid has a sense of humor."  
   No man deserves to be your toilet paper so that you can think your shit doesn't stink.  I think I'll use my sorcery and give my biological brother and sister-in-law a heart attack tonight.  Is that illegal Sheriff?  Can I have G. Gordon Liddy bring packages and gifts to your wife, invoking him with my magic?  Is that illegal?  Say hello to my MOTHER.   
   Damn, I'm so happy that I'm not totally human.  I only do these things so that you will repent; next, you will be saved.  It's called tough love.  Yup, I'll put a little pressure on my brother's thoracic portion tonight.  Just to remind all people of the Gemini persuasion that Christ can blow your nose any damn time.  My sign has a Trinity of aspects, the most powerful sign.  I can be anything I want.
   It's all an allegory.  Get over it.  I have no magic.  God is not real.  Jesus is fake.  The Bible is total crap.  Feel the love guys.  Feel the love.  The King is in the field, and the Son of David lives forever.  

Star Wars Episode II - Obi-Wan Kenobi meets Jango Fett