About Britney Spears And Male Genitalia--An Anthropological Treatise is now available on Apple iTunes, or can be ordered at Barnes and Noble.Com or Amazon.Com--here's a link: Mark David King's Books
This brief tale of teenage torture follows the lascivious likes of Merlin Asterchat and his younger brother simply dubbed Jelly Roll. Merlin has just been sexually denounced by a high school tart turned insidious by way of his pathetic size underneath timid trousers; specifically, she laughed at his small, curved manpiece, blurting out descriptive details to her and Merlin's entire high school class. Moreover, sexual news in high school travels with more mercury than even Einstein might have theorized; hence, Merlin becomes a laughing stock and scholastic exile, avoiding with due conscience the likes of anybody who might know him.
On the flip side, Merlin's younger, pre-pubescent brother offers optimism, all in hopes of recharging his older brother's sexual batteries. "Be who you are! Don't be ashamed!" Wends the advice of wise young Jelly Roll Asterchat; nonetheless, Merlin crumbles, unable to humble himself to the fact that he has a small penis. Thus, he explodes into an adolescent runaway, unable to shake his compulsive visions of large johnsons pleasing teenage tail--something he will never be able to do.
All in all--this is not a scandalous poetic novella, but a piece of science; alas, it is even contained within the libraries of a few schools and has been studied by a number of nutty urologists. Jelly Roll becomes the author, penning precise pros and cons about penis size, ranking them from 3 to 9 inches, knowing anything below or above that proves to be sexual hysteria. He uses fast cars and super hero metaphors to forge linguistic axioms about the truth of the penis--what the certain sizes can do to a woman's vagina, whether stretch a clitoris fantastic, or imp on in, culminating with the humility of premature discharge, offering the dame distress and self hate, her crying on the toilet for hours that her boyfriend is not hung like her sister's.
Young girls who suffer from morbid obesity get all the attention--no longer!!! Now, guys with small or curved penis' too can complain and vex about their suffering, and how they are maligned and mistreated by all the pretty girls, knowing pretty girls only pick the big johnsons. Oh it's true, it's true; alas, Jelly Roll usurps all the madness, trumping truth with trial and error, concluding that all men, regardless of length and girth, have a chance to enslave a saucy babe with bedroom eyes. Love always gives us a chance. Love can complete any woman, proving the best orgasm happens in the heart--or so does young Jelly hope.
Sincerely, Mark David King
